I need to make a change in 2025. I feel miserable, like I am wandering aimlessly and without purpose. I know that change won’t be easy, but right now I am in a bad place. I also know that I can’t make a lot of big changes at once; that won’t make lasting changes. That is my previous experience in change. This is my record of where I started and where I am going.
I am living in a place of constant stress and because of it, I at one point was up 30 pounds. I am down from that about 10, but it is just a start. This is not about weight. It is about health. When I started working full time, I stopped running, and I stopped lifting weights. I just didn’t have time.
Once I stopped exercising, I also stopped making healthier choices for my body. There was no balance. Instead of jumping on the treadmill or going out for a walk, I ate my emotions.
I no longer find joy in my job. I don’t know if it is the job itself or the culmination of the past three years and the choices I’ve made. This is something I need to figure out!
The stress I feel at work has bubbled over into my home life and it feels like I have no escape from those feelings, except when I am immersed in video games. This has also become an unhealthy coping mechanism.
And then there is the wine. There is nothing like a glass of wine to calm the nerves within. Of course it doesn’t solve anything. It just depresses my nervous system making it easier to deal with all of this.
These are the things I need to change in 2025.
I don’t know 100% how I am going to do that yet. There are healthier changes I started to make in 2024 that I need to learn to incorporate more: Yoga, crochet, journaling, and boundaries are all ways I can create a happier life for myself.
I also want to change our eating habits, less chemicals, less sugar and more nourishing, nutrient dense choices.
It is a lot, but if I focus on just a little bit at a time, it is not impossible and hopefully at the end of 2025 I will feel like I have achieved something and there is once again purpose to my life.
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